LOVE

NO IM NOT READY TO BE A MOM

I DONT WANT TO HAVE A BABY

I DONT WANT TO BE PREGNANT

I KNOW I HAVE TO GROW UP NOW

I KNOW ITS GOING TO BE HARD, LIKE REALLY HARD

I KNOW IM GOING TO WANT TO GIVE UP

I KNOW AT SOME POINT IM GOING SO CRY SO HARD

MY HEAD HURTS AND IM GOING TO WANT TO CRAWL TO MY OWN MOMMY

AND BE THE BABY AGAIN

BUT I WONT BE ABLE TO

I KNOW IM GOING TO HAVE TO GIVE MY LAST TO SOMEOONE ELSE

I DONT WANT TO BE STUCK IN THE HOUSE WHILE MY FRIENDS

GO OUT

YES MY LIFE IS GOING TO GO FRM CRUISE MODE, TO MANUAL IN A MATTER OF SECONDS

AND NO I CANT LET MY MOM DO IT FOR ME

AND YES I WILL BE AFRAID

AND YES I AM SCARED NOW

AND NO IVE NEVER TOOK CARE OF ANYTHING ELSE BESIDES ME

I UNDERSTAND I WILL HAVE TO WORK.SCHOOL.AND STAY UP ALL NIGHT WITH

ANOTHER LITTLE LIFE

AND STILL PASS, AND NOT CALL INTO TO WORK BECAUSE IM TIRED

I KNOW THIS ISNT LIKE HIGHSCHOOL AND I KANT GET A DR'S NOTE

OUT OF THE MESS I GOT MYSELF INTO

AND THEN IM GOING TO CRY AGAIN

BUT I KNOW I HAVE TO BE THE STRONG ONE NOW

YES IM ALONE IN ALL THIS

NO THE FATHER LEFT, ILL BE DOING THIS BYMYSELF

YES I UNDERSTAND THAT MAKES EVERYTHING TEN TIMES WORSE

YES I UNDERSTAND I WONT BE DATING LIKE A YOUNG WOMAN CAN

AT MY AGE

NO IM NOT OK WITH THAT

YES I AM DEPRESSED AND ANGRY AT THE SAME TIME

NO IM NOT GETTING AN ABORTION TO AVOID ALL THE PAIN

I COULDNT LIVE WITH MYSELF

IS THAT THE BEST DECISION FOR ME. MAYBE NOT

AM I SURE ?

NO IM NOT,

BUT I AM SURE IM NOT GOING TO LET THAT WAY ON MY HEART

WHILE U ALL SMILE. AND IM DYING INSIDE

NO I DONT KNOW HOW TO BE A PARENT

YES, I DO KNOW WHAT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING

YOU CAN GIVE A CHILD

Me And Him

By a splash of serendipity and a little luck

i came across him

first thing came to my mind, "never again"

but how beautiful he was to me

like a sunrise, no, sun set over the islands sea

perfect complexity

i understood him however, for like my fingerprint

he was unique

and my heart danced to his heart,

as together we created another heartbeat

oh but he left, yes he did

and i dont know how to feel

because i cant tell if the heartbeats real

its too soon to tell

and everywhere i go i still smell his smell

breathing away the sanity thats left in me

suffocating myself at the same time

while i let marvin gaye tell me everything will be fine

and tupac say keep ya head up, and r.kelly sympathise with me saying i know ur fed up.

i wish i didnt tear up, every time i looked up

the thought of me and him coming to an end

its horrible a nightmare, we're not even friends

when i close my eyes i drift off to no where,

the place where no heartbeats exsist

and love never resist

and pain is healed with a kiss

so i write my lyrics to this

open my eyes and me and the heartbeat is back to reality

its just me and the heartbeat

wondering if he is missing me

actually like how im missing the we

we had before this heartbeat came inbetween us

when we had no inbetween us

you know the naked truth

he got me pleading all my sins in the preachers booth

he got me going down

and im not sure if this was his idea

but like drake he is easily influenced by the niggas he's around

oh but what about the heartbeat

now im crying on the ground

the heart beat that ruined my life, because it wants a chance a life

yes my selfisnish, childishnis, immaturity aint right

but niether is a baby having a baby

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